Listen First...

Listen before Jumping to Conclusions....

Why Kashmir belongs to India

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations assembly that made the world community smile.

A representative from India began: 'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about Rishi Kashyap of Kashmir, after whom Kashmir is named. When he struck a rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath.' He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water. When he got out and wanted to dress, 
his clothes had vanished. A Pakistani had stolen them.'

The Pakistani representative jumped up Furiously and shouted, 'What are you talking about? The Pakistanis weren't there then.'

The Indian representative smiled and said, 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech. And they say Kashmir belongs to them'. 

THE PROFESSOR AND THE MYSTIC

In a small town of Iran, there lived a Professor of Geography who had a close friend - the local Sufi mystic. One day, when they were going for their usual walk together, the Professor told his friend," Janaab, I like you very much for your compassion, your helpful attitude, your poetic insights, your kindness to all and your sense of humour. You are the best human being I have ever met. But there is one thing about you that I find very difficult to accept."    'Pray, what is that, please do tell me frankly.’ the mystic answered, ‘I have learnt from my Master that my critic is my best friend. You are my best friend, so I also want you to play the role of critic’,    "It is your way of trying to explain the happenings of this world. You use very circuitous language, and make things difficult to understand. Throughout my college and university days, I have trained myself in simple logic, in the efficacy of cause and effect. Why can't you try to do the same?”    The mystic did not answer, and they proceeded with their walk. Soon, they came to the market square, where a big crowd had collected. On enquiry, they were told that everyone was there to witness the public hanging of a person convicted of theft.    'Can you tell me, Professor, using your cause-and-effect theory, why this person is being hanged?' asked the mystic.    'Simple. Because he stole.' said the Professor triumphantly, and the mystic did not dispute that.    They carried on with their walk, and when they were passing a house, the mystic asked the Professor, 'do you know whose house this is?'    'Yes, it belongs to Abdullah the thief.'    'Why do you say Abdullah the thief?' asked the mystic.    'Because everyone knows he steals.'    'Oh, then why isn't he being hanged?'    'Because he has never been caught.' confidently answered the Professor, with a twinkle in his eye    'Then tell me, Professor, was that poor man in the market square being hanged because he stole or because he was caught?'    'Well,' said the Professor rather defensively, ' it was both, I guess.'   'Now' said the mystic, ' let us go back and investigate a little more. Let us find out how that man was caught.'   They went back to the market square and discovered that a resident of the locality who wanted to travel to Kabul had gone to the nearby river to cross it, but found that in spite of it being the summer month, the river was flooded. The resident cursed himself for not having started earlier from his home (as was his original plan) for it was getting dark, and so he could not go back safely. So, he decided to spend the night in an abandoned shelter there itself, and while doing so, he had seen the thief running away from the town with his booty.    'Now tell me, Professor, is this man being hanged because he is a thief, or because he was caught, or because this other resident delayed his start for Kabul and therefore spotted him that night?'    Now it was the turn of the Professor to keep quiet.    The mystic carried on: ' It is actually even more complicated than that. You are a Professor of Geography. You know this river should be quite dry in the summer months, yet it was flooded that night. And you know its cause.'    'Yes,' answered the Professor,' unusual and unexpected floods are occurring on this river because sometime back the tree cover next to the Hindu Kush mountains has been eradicated, the forests destroyed.'    'And who did that, and why?'    ' 50 years ago Changez Khan wanted to invade India via a route that the defender would not expect, and so he was creating a new route on which his soldiers could go.'    'So now tell me, is this man being hanged because he is a thief, or because he got caught, or because the other man delayed his departure for Kabul or because Changez Khan decided to invade India 50 years ago?'    As the Professor lapsed into thoughtful silence, the mystic said,' My dear man, everything in this world is interconnected, we are all part of an indivisible whole. To understand the universe, you have to become the Whole, and not just analyze it into parts. When you use cause and effect logic, you are analyzing the parts. That is fine, nothing wrong with it, for God has endowed us with an intellect which is meant for analysis The problem happens when we become arrogant enough to feel that we have the answer, when all that we have is a perspective. A perspective is just that - a perspective – and is no more right or wrong than any other perspective, however powerful may be the intellect behind it. The Hindus refer to these perspectives as maya  because they  represent duality, whereas Reality is at the level of what they call Advaita  So, when I give you circuitous arguments for explaining any worldly phenomenon, I am merely drawing your attention to the reality of this Great Truth of advaita, of one-ness, which cannot be explained by any human words because all human languages convey things only by comparison, that is, by perspectives that exist at the level of maya, of duality.' “You mean to say,” asked the Professor,” to know reality I have to become a Hindu?” “Oh no, not at all”. answered the mystic “Reality is one, available within every human being. The one-ness that the Hindu mystics refer to is conveyed by the mystics and saints of all religions. Christ has said ‘if thine eye be single, they whole body shall be full of light’, and elaborated saying that this ‘singularity’  becomes evident as we purify our mind of all the evils or selfishness lying within it. By doing so, we don’t change our religion, but become a better human being, whatever religion we have been born in. Our own Jalaluddin Rumi conveyed this so beautifully:   The lamps are different, but the light is the same- it comes from beyond. If you keep looking at the lamp, thou are lost – For thence arises number and plurality. Fix your gaze upon the light.

Basic Laws of Life

 These basic laws of life operate in all circumstances all the time!

1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch & you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, or screw, when dropped will roll to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. 

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal & someone always answers.

6. Variation Law - If you change waiting lines or traffic lanes, the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

11.. Law of the Theater & Sports Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle 
         They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet, & who leave 
         The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies & stay to 
          Aisle people also are very surly folk.

12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness & cost of the carpet or rug.

15. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,and by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.

Evolution

Important words

The 6 most important words: I admit that I was wrong.

The 5 most important words: You did a great job!

The 4 most important words: What do you think?

The 3 most important words: Would you please…

The 2 most important words: Thank you!

The most important word: We.

The least important word: I.

Chinese Products

A chinese man married an African woman and had a child. Two months later the child passed away.

At the funeral house a family member of the African woman kept sobbing and crying,and kept saying I JUST KNEW IT!!

So a family elder pulled her aside and discreetly asked her  'what she knew?'

She replied 'Chinese products don't last!'

Just Drink - Don't Drive

Finally it has happened..
BEER is now cheaper than PETROL 
Now there will be a new slogan..

"JUST DRINK-DON'T DRIVE" 

Last wish

Happy Navaratras