14 Types of Cousins

1. The Goofball Cousin - He’s the one who makes the jokes at all the family get-together and functions. He loves being the family jester and the undisputed centre of attention.   2. The Over-Achieving Cousin Sister - There’s an over-achieving sister in every family. She has at least three degrees, has probably studied abroad, written a book or two and has a high paying job while juggling a family at the same time.   3. The Playboy Elder Brother - He’s the care-free, happy go lucky womanizer all the boys in the family idolize and wish to emulate. But that’s easier said than done. Because you can’t acquire the game, you’re born with it.   4. The Responsible One - Remember Salman khan’s character from Baghban? This cousin is the real life version of the reel life “sanskaari” Alok. They’re polite, studious and impeccably mannered; and more often than not, whenever you do something stupid, you are told to “Kuch seekho ussey!”   5. The Terrible Twosome - They’re always a pair. And they’re always about the same age. Individually, they are sheep. But together, they are lions. Annoying, sarcastic, boisterous little lions who make fun of everyone in the family and get away with it because “ye toh abhi bacchey hain.”   6. The Kindergarten Squad - Little children are cute, but they can be slightly annoying at times. Now imagine a whole bunch of toddlers running around the place, laughing, crying, screaming and pooping at the drop of a hat. And they’re all related.   7. The Shy Cousin - She is shy. Like really, really shy. You’ve probably never heard a word from their mouth. And when you have, it was an indiscernible squeak. When the cousins get together, she’s the one who makes an excuse and bolts as soon as possible.   8. The Vagabond - He’s often used as a cautionary tale in the family. “Whatever you do, don’t end up like him.” But you don’t care, because he’s the most chilled out person you’ve ever met.   9. The “Foren” Cousins - They’re the ones who stay in “Emreeka” or “Kaneda” and fly down to meet you once every 5 years or so. Every time they visit, their accent becomes thicker and thicker.   10. The Cousins You Only See At A Wedding - That is literally the first time you ever see them .You wave at them, smile and then wait awkwardly for someone to introduce you to them.   11. The Doting Cousin Sister - This is especially true for guys who are single kids or only have brothers in their own family. You always have that one cousin sister who thinks the world of you. And even if she lives far from you, every time you receive her “rakhi” in the mail on Rakshabandhan, you smile from ear to ear.   12. The Artistic Cousin - He’s the cousin with whom you can’t have a conversation without feeling like you know nothing about culture and the arts.   13. The Cousin With All The Advice - You try to avoid him, but in the end, he finds you anyway. He’s usually way older than you and has a family of his own. But since he can’t lecture his wife or his toddlers, he grabs you and starts telling you everything that he has learnt in life so far.   14. The Cousin You Love To Hang Out With - Your favourite cousin. The cousin with whom you have an effortless rapport with and can to for hours.

15 Ways to Recharge Your Energy Levels!

1. Eat a banana Bananas provide minerals, nutrients and stimulants such as potassium, which provides controlled energy, preferred to the type of energy obtained all at once from simple sugars.   2. Place head between your legs This trick will get blood flowing to your head. Sit on a chair and put your head between your legs. Send your arms towards the floor and relax your body for 20 seconds. After the time has passed, rise slowly, vertebra by vertebra. This exercise will give you energy that gradually unfolds.   3. Drink Green Tea Yes we've said it before, but the fact still remains that green tea has an abundance of phytochemicals called tannins. These help, among other things, to calm the nervous system and thus increase the feeling of well-being.   4. Pinch your cheeks Our grandparents probably had a good reason to pinch our cheek. This stimulates the blood flow to the face and makes you feel more alert.   5. Drink lots of water All body systems require a large amount of water to function. In the absence of water in the body, proper functioning slows, blood flow becomes weaker and less oxygen reaches the brain. Drink a glass of water every two hours at least, when the goal is to drink 8-12 glasses of water a day.   6. Get some sun Small doses of vitamin D can be a great incentive. Take a walk or sit a few minutes in the sun. Fresh air combined with natural light will make you feel more alert.   7. Move the body Once you feel the fatigue taking over, get up and shake your body. Do some stretching, push-ups, a short trip or just a few jumps instead. Movement stimulates blood flow in the body and releases endorphins that make you feel alert.   8. Laugh out loud Laughter has been shown to de-stress us but also acts as a natural stimulant. A good belly laugh releases endorphins that neutralize the bad effects of the hormone cortisol (stress hormone), increase blood flow and oxygen and give you a sense of well being.   9. Take a deep breath Take a deep breath and slowly let it out through your nose, and again, fill your abdomen and exhale, emptying all the air from your lungs. Do it three times. Breathing will help your body relax and get rid of toxins, and the oxygen will stimulate you.   10. Put in a house plant Stuffy offices have limited air movement which can increase fatigue and cause headaches and allergies. Insert household plants that can help filter out volatile chemical compounds and airborne pollutants, as well as stimulate air movement to better help you deal with the standing air, and make you feel less fatigued.   11. Smell a lemon Certain smells like citrus, ginger and mint can produce a stimulating effects and increase alertness. Light a scented candle or sniff a lemon for stimulating energy and improved mood.   12. Surround yourself in red  Studies show that the color red is associated with a sense of victory and confidence. Try to surround yourself in shades of red to elevate your mood.   13. Sit upright It wouldn't hurt to stand up straight in the chair. An Upright posture not only helps blood and oxygen to move more freely, but also enhances the sense of security.   14. Wake up the brain  When the brain feels drowsy, try to wake him by solving a crossword puzzle, reading aloud, talking to a friend, a quick recitation or singing.    15. Play with a pet Spend time with your furry friend. It will make you feel happier and more energetic!

Why am I so Poor?

A poor man asked the Buddha,

“Why am I so poor?”

The Buddha said, “you do not learn to give.”

So the poor man said, “If I’m not having anything?”

Buddha said: “You have a few things,

The Face, which can give a smile;

Mouth: you can praise or comfort others;

The Heart: it can open up to others;

Eyes: who can look the other with the eyes of goodness;

Body: which can be used to help others.”

So, actually we are not poor at all, poverty of spirit is the real poverty.

Prison Vs Office Cubicle

IN PRISON : You spend the majority of your time in an 8'X10' cell .
AT WORK : You spend most of your time in a 6'X8' cubicle ..

IN PRISON : You get three meals a day (free).
AT WORK: You only get a break for one meal and probably have to pay for it yourself .

IN PRISON : you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK : you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.

IN PRISON: a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you ..  
AT WORK: you must carry around a security card and unlock/open all the doors yourself .

IN PRISON: you can watch TV and play games.  
AT WORK : you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON: they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK: you can not even speak to your family and friends.

IN PRISON: all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all. 
AT WORK: You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.  

Contemporary Philosophers

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part
of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.
~ John Glenn

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When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes.
When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.
~ Desmond Tutu

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America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population
believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.
~ David Letterman

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I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. God dammit, I'm a billionaire.
--Howard Hughes

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After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.
~ Italian proverb

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Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them
for thirty years.
~ Betsy Salkind

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The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength
of the lifeboats.
~ Jean Kerr

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I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out
the garbage.
~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

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You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
--Jeff Foxworthy

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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new
wife.
~ Prince Philip

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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
~ Emo Philips.

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Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.
~ Harrison Ford

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The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree.
~ Spike Milligan

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Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.
~ Robin Hall

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Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million and you're a conqueror.
~ Jean Rostand.

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Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but
I'm just as happy as when I had 48 million.
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger.

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We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I
have no idea.
~ WH Auden

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In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture
naked.
--Jonathan Katz

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If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the
impersonators would be dead.
~ Johnny Carson

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I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very skeptical.
~ Warren Tantum ~

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Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man
wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
~ Steve Martin

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Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.
~ Jimmy Durante

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America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.
~ Doug Hamwell

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The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.
~ George Roberts

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If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the
airport.
~ Jonathan Winters

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I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
~ Robert Benchley